subimpact.net

Year: 2012

  • Common Relationship Problems

    Something interesting i’ve stumbled upon as below:-

    The biggest relationship mistake i see young men make is thinking that “women are this way” from all the stupid “forever alone”, “hey aren’t girls crazy, and “hey listen to this story about my crazy girlfriend” stories that float around.
    Here’s the straight scoop. There is a woman who will love playing video games with you. There is a woman who loves sports. Hell there is a woman who loves polka if that’s what you’re into. Don’t get stuck in the trap of believing “what girls are like” and accepting someone who doesn’t mesh with you based on this foolish common “knowledge”.
    If you don’t want to be forced to watch sex and the city, find a woman who’s not interested in sex and the city, or one who is but who respects that you aren’t. Don’t want to go shopping? Tell your woman or find one who doesn’t want to drag you along.
    Many of the problems i hear guys complaining about could be easily fixed by finding someone who actually shares their interested instead of the first hot body that catches their eye, or by putting their foot down at the beginning of the relationship. Don’t pretend you like things you don’t, don’t go out of your way to pretend you’re someone you’re not, just be you and find someone who enjoys what you do.
    I think this is the secret to happiness in relationships.

    ——————————————————————————————

    The biggest relationship mistake I see young women make is thinking that “men will become the way I want” from all the stupid romantic comedies and TV dramas that float around.
    Here’s the straight scoop. There is a man who will fulfill your dreams. If the guy you’re with isn’t that man at this moment, then he will never be. Stop stringing him along and holding him to your standards. Even if he starts doing the things you want him to, he will resent you for only appreciating how you define him, not how he defines himself. And you will be unsatisfied that he caved and made the changes to keep you, rather than because he’s a self-respecting, confident man who knows who he is.
    Many of the problems I hear girls complaining about could be easily fixed by finding someone who actually does the things that she wants him to do, rather than pretending that her guy will do them some day… eventually. Stop trying to mold your man into something he’s not. If you can’t appreciate him the way he is break up with him. Do the both of you a favor and stop wasting his time. Then focus on finding someone who already fits the mold.
    In essence, respect yourself for who you are, and respect the one you’re with for who she/he is.
    I think this is the secret to happiness in relationships.

    i loled

    Guys are generally driven by logic and thus try to “fix” any problems in a logical manner. We are all emotion driven creatures. Yes men too. But trying to tackle something illogical as love in a logical manner usually results in undesirable results.

    An example of this is when say your SO is having a bad day. She tells you about how her friend is backstabbing her or her parents are being unfair. A guy would take the “if you don’t want to get wet, don’t go out in the rain” approach. Meaning guys would say something like, “Well don’t hang out with that friend anymore, or your parents are right not being unfair”. Whether or not it’s the truth is irrelevant. Girls don’t tell you about their problems because they want solutions, but rather a person that will listen to them and take their side. This is something that took me a long time to get. You can discuss after the emotions have cooled down (days after) to say something like, “You don’t need friends like that” or “maybe your parents had a good point”. But when they tell you something, just be a good listener and take their side. Don’t try to “fix” it. Just listen.

    It’s been said many times here, but communication is the key. Never assume anything. Don’t try to read between the lines, because often, those are made up in your head. Every time I assume something, I remember this: Assuming makes an ASS out of U and ME. I know in my 9 year relationship, we both could have saved a lot of heartache and strife if we just communicated better.

  • First 42KM achieved

    completed my first full marathon run, on 18 November 2012 @ Penang Bridge. All I can say it was a superb experience.

    I must say it was really mind blown by my own feat (also thanks to my partner which supports me through out this journey for success)

  • Project #42km

    This year i’ve finally manage to took a feat which I always dreamed off, taking a full marathon event.

    What is a full marathon ? its 42.195kilometer run which usually takes 6 hours or lesser to complete it. Thats like the distance from my house to Kuala Lumpur by foot.

    Well today is my 3rd day of training. The sad part ever since I’ve enrolled to this event, my mom and girlfriend was very unsupportive. Seriously? from the two most person I love in this world and yet they pull me down straight away from my capability. How disspointing.

    Yet to the few which was on my facebook page they been quite supportive and gave me motivation to persue this event 🙂 god bless you guys and many thanks.

    my 1st day of training was a short 7km run around my neighbouring field.

    and yesterday was my 2nd day with an extra 1.5km to my previous run. Seriously it wasn’t easy, the after effects from the 1st day soreness really demotivated me in doing my 2nd day run.

    However with a do or die perception, i manage to pull myself together by god’s grace and ran my 8.5km last night. Regretting slightly on getting a US size 10 jogging shoe, my right side of foot had slight blistering due to the  tightness of the shoe.

    well i guess today will be another day for me to challenge myself for more mileage, but at least 5km would do due to my total soreness from both of my legs. Manage to swap my running shoe for a US size 11 so I hope i dont get blisters today.

    Consider this jogging session is a really marvelous time for me spending time with god on my mind and having devotional time with him.

    will keep you guys update on my running sessions stay tune 😀 #42km

  • Gaming Level (Battlefield 3)

    High level play begins not with your mouse or controller, but with your mind. Always remember that. Not just your ability to process information and act on it, but also your ability to not defeat yourself. Most people have no idea that they are their own worst enemy. What I mean by this is pure mindset. If everytime you die, you blame anything other than yourself, then all you’ve succeeded in doing is making an excuse not to get better.

    A mature attitude views everything as learning. When a skilled player dies, they ask themselves what to adjust to prevent it from happening again. The key being themselves and adjust. Those who succeed do so because they operate under the assumption that they must adjust to the game, NOT THE OTHER WAY AROUND. Thus, if a weapon / class / skill is really powerful, you figure out how to use it.

    The immature attitude always faults lag, teammates or the game for their short comings. Everyone knows “that guy” who plays just as much as you, always complains, yet never does better. The reason is that they can’t internalize their natural learning process and apply a feedback loop, because their pride blocks it. High level play has pride, but that’s because they’ve put in countless hours of study, practice and self-inspection on making their game better.


    This is why video games are like any sport: it requires patience, dedication, perseverance and mental fortitude to win. Some champions are born with raw talent, but the vast majority of them are built from putting clay into the oven. Not only that though, you need the BELIEF that you can become a champion player. And this is where most of you will defeat yourselves, because when I say any one of you reading this can become legendary, I seriously mean it. You don’t believe it because you say to yourself: “Oh my reactions aren’t that fast”, “I’m just not that good” or “I’m just playing for fun”. Those are all excuses. You don’t need fast reactions. You’re not good because you don’t try. If you’re playing for fun, why are you here reading this?


    The thing is, if you cannot believe that you will become a better player, you’ve already lost. All star players, types like Michael Jordan, they thrive in the opportunity to take the last shot of the game when their team is down. They have a hunger to win that supercedes any fear of losing. You cannot play in fear, as it impedes your ability to adapt and learn.

    This is the reason I love video games, because subtly act as a mental training tool. It provides instant feedback when I do something right AND something wrong. I can apply this feedback loop to correct myself immediately. Secondary, it’s a perfectly safe environment, where the only thing that can be damanged is my ego.

    For anyone in doubt, video games (notably multiplayer) in the end, are all about self-worth. It’s your ego on the line vs someone else. That’s why we obtain enjoyment from every kill, because you are proving your worth against another, just like sports. So when “that guy” is shown a weapon damage spreadsheet or video tutorial and he scoffs, saying “I just play for fun”, it’s an indirect way of saying that he isn’t willing to get better or doesn’t believe he can get better. He’s actually afraid of trying, because that might actually expose his own ego. Those who actually play for fun, aren’t afraid of losing because their ego isn’t in the game to begin with.

    So if you do care about winning, you owe it to yourself to believe than you CAN do better and that you WILL do better. Macolm Gladwell (author of Blink and Tipping Point), writes about the concept of Mastery in his book Outliers. Mastery is concept of becoming totally adept at any one subject. Whereas most people look at someone with mastery and think that they cannot achieve that level, Gladwell shows that just about anyone can achieve this level of proficiency… and that there is a magic number when it happens: 10,000. And by that, he means 10,000 hours. Your jaw may drop, because you can’t fathom the idea of spending 10,000 hours on video games. No one is asking or expecting you to. But this is a mental exercise of saying, if you were simply capable? If the answer is yes, then you admit that you can take steps to being legendary. On that, why not take them then? No one is asking you to take all 10,000 steps, but just see where it takes you. Pretend to be great and you might just succeed.


    Those of you who haven’t deboarded the pep-talk train, I realize that many of you have the drive to learn, but don’t have the resources available. Reading at places like /r/battlefield3 and improving your mental game is a fantastic first step. Motor mechanics are a huge aspect of the game that can’t be overlooked, but that is predominantly something you will just have to practice (which I can help point out). And when I say practice, I mean actual learning mindset and not logging more hours.

    Learning, in the most purest simplification, is pushing you outside your comfort zone and building new neural pathways. Everytime you play a new map or use a new weapon, are you in learning mode. But when you are playing with the goal of just racking up your score, that is not learning, that is utilizing what you already knew. Remember that the games you do worst in are the games where you learn the most. On the other side, the games where you stomp on the other team, you probably learned nothing. This is why while BF3 montages of massacres are fun to watch, they teach you nothing practical.

    So, understand that playing and practicing utilize totally different parts of your mind, because when you are playing, you are mostly on autopilot.

    When you are practicing, you are emptying out everything you know and learning anew.
    For example: You play assault, like the M16A3, shoot in full auto, play mid-range and sometimes up and close. You jump on a server, utilize your known play style, kill people, play the objective and are done. What have you learned? Probably not much, but you had fun.


    Now, instead, you are given a 870MCS with buck. You cannot play mid range and are single shooting. This is unfamilar. You engage at medium, realize you have to get in close and dirty, which you have trouble with. You’re dying a lot, it’s frustrating and you just want to switch back to your rifle. This is learning right here. Practice means playing it through the endless deaths, learning how to get close without notice and picking your fights. The point isn’t that you’ve learned a shotgun. The point is that you’ve learned the patience of closing engagement range and picking your fights. You need to be taken out of your comfort zone in order to expand your abilities. This is the true definition of learning.

    If you want to become a better player, you need to push the envelope of what you’re used to. I love the new DICE assignments because they are forcing everyone to play with weapons they might not to unlock new items. If you want to push your own abilities, I challenge you to the following:

    Equip the 870MCS on Metro or Grand Bazaar. Never stop running, for any reason, even to shoot or reload. 1 round.
    Equip only the M320 on Canals or Grand Bazzar with extra 40mm perk. Shoot at everything that moves in a window or against a wall. If you run out of ammo, suicide yourself. 1 round.
    Pick your favorite non-sniper rifle. Put it on single shot. 2 rounds.
    Equip the F2000. Put a laser on it. You are not allowed to do anything but hip shoot. 1 round.
    Equip the ASVAL. Play until you kill at least 7 in a row only using the ASVAL. If you die or use any other weapon, start over with the count.
    Equip your fav pistol. Play until you kill at least 5 in a row only using the pistol. If you die or use any other weapon, start over with the count.
    Equip the biggest LMG you have. You are not allowed to fire it, as much as you are tempted. You can, however, stab people in the back with your knife. 2 rounds.
    After these are done, play your absolute best. Every kill counts. 3 rounds.

    These challenges are all designed with very specific goals in mind. Those of you who understood flow from the last post will readily see the purpose of these exercises. They are also all difficult and you should expect to die and be frustrated. But you will learn and especially on how to put your ego aside.

    Besides practice, in both sports and video games, the watching of films/replays are mandatory. Films are a direct way of analyzing your own mistakes after the fact. Watching films of others also gives you incredible insight into how top level players think. Do you know if you miss more frequently to the left or right? How often do you get flanked when it should have been apparent? How often do you reload at a very bad time?

    If you watch film, you can answer these questions and analyze what is going on in the game. In all the most competitive games, StarCraft, CS, Halo, there are libraries of film/replays out there for people to watch for this very reason. Watching a full video of a skilled player at work is where you gain the most. Not only that, the videos where they LOSE are worth their weight in gold, as it shows mistakes they made that can contrast the successes on films where they do well.

  • Armin van Buuren presents Gaia – J’ai Envie De Toi

  • All Tree Huggers, Earth Savers & Eco-Warriors should own this car!!

    All Tree Huggers, Earth Savers & Eco-Warriors should own this car!!: Inspired by how Mother Nature does things naturally, Honda created a range of hybrid cars to give something back to nature. Whether you are naturally progressive, naturally intelligent or downright naturally awesome, there’s a Honda Hybrid for all of you!

  • Shell Helix is giving away prizes worth over RM200,000. Here’s how you can win them.

    Shell Helix is giving away prizes worth over RM200,000. Here’s how you can win them.: Get your chance to win an all expense paid VIP trip to Italy. Buy a minimum of 4 litres of Shell Helix Ultra, Shell Helix HX7, Shell Helix HX7 E or Shell Helix HX7 Diesel, get the contest form and submit your entries!

  • Food for thoughts


    Eckhart Tolle believes we create and maintain problems because they give us a sense of identity. Perhaps this explains why we often hold onto our pain far beyond its ability to serve us.
    We replay past mistakes over and over again in our head, allowing feelings of shame and regret to shape our actions in the present. We cling to frustration and worry about the future, as if the act of fixation somehow gives us power. We hold stress in our minds and bodies, potentially creating serious health issues, and accept that state of tension as the norm.
    Though it may sound simple, Ajahn Chah’s advice speaks volumes:

    “If you let go a little, you will have a little peace. If you let go a lot, you will have a lot of peace.”
    There will never be a time when life is simple. There will always be time to practice accepting that. Every moment is a chance to let go and feel peaceful.

    1. Visualize a box in your head labeled “Expectations.” Whenever you start dwelling on how things should be or should have been, mentally shelve the thoughts in this box.

    2. Focus all your energy on something you can actually control, instead of dwelling on things you can’t.

    3. Change your perception—see the root cause as a blessing in disguise.

    4. Cry it out. According to Dr. William Frey II, PH.D., biochemist at the Ramset Medical Center in Minneapolis crying away your negative feelings releases harmful chemicals that build up in your body due to stress.

    5. Remind yourself that anger hurts you more than the person who upset you, and visualize it melting away as an act of kindness to yourself.

    6. Take responsibility. Many times when you’re angry, you focus on what someone else did that was wrong—which essentially gives away your power. When you focus on what you could have done better, you often feel empowered and less bitter.

    7. Put yourself in the offender’s shoes. We all make mistakes; and odds are you could have easily slipped up just like your husband, father, or friend did. Compassion dissolves anger.

    8. Use a stress ball, and express your anger physically and vocally when you use it. Make a scrunched up face or grunt. You may feel silly, but this allows you to actually express what you’re feeling inside.

    9. Wear a rubber band on your wrist, and gently flick it when you start obsessing on angry thoughts. This trains your mind to associate that type of persistent negativity with something unpleasant.

    10. Remind yourself these are your only three options: remove yourself from the situation, change it, or accept it. These acts create happiness; holding onto bitterness never does.

    11. Identify what the experience taught you to help develop a sense of closure.

    12. Remember both the good and the bad. Even if appears this way now, the past was not perfect. Acknowledging this may minimize your sense of loss. As Laura Oliver says, “It’s easier to let go of a human than a hero.”

    13. Un-romanticize the way you view love. Of course you’ll feel devastated if you believe you lost your soul mate. If you think you can find a love that amazing or better again it will be easier to move on.

    14. Visualize an empowered single you—the person you were before meeting your last love. That person was pretty awesome, and now you have the chance to be him or her again.

    15. Reward yourself for small acts of acceptance. Get a facial after you delete his number from your phone, or head out with friends after putting all her things in a box.

    16. Hang this statement somewhere you can see it. “Loving myself means letting go.”

    18. Replace your emotional thoughts with facts. When you think, “I’ll never feel loved again!” don’t resist that feeling. Instead, move on to another thought, like “I learned a new song for karaoke tonight.”

    19. Use the silly voice technique. According to Russ Harris, author of The Happiness Trap, swapping the voice in your head with a cartoon voice will help take back power from the troubling thought.

    20. Use a deep breathing technique, like ujayii, to soothe yourself and seep into the present moment.

    21. Consider this quotation by Eckhart Tolle: “Worry pretends to be necessary but serves no useful purpose.” Questioning how your stress serves you may help you let it go.

    22. Use it up. Make two lists: one with the root causes of your stress, and one with actions to address them. As you complete these tasks, visualize yourself utilizing and depleting your “stress supply.”

    23.Learn to trust again — by trusting yourself. Dr. Phil tells a man who’s having a hard time letting women back into his life: “Trust is not about how much you trust one person or another to do right or wrong.

    24.How much you trust another person is a function of how much you trust yourself to be strong enough to deal with their imperfections.” Have enough faith in yourself to be able to put yourself on the line with someone, without any guarantee of what will happen next.

    25.If you’re playing the game with sweaty palms, it’s because you’re afraid of what you can or can’t do, or dealing with your own imperfections — it’s not about the other person.

    26.Know that you will get hurt if you’re in a relationship. There is no perfect person without flaws. Even a well-intended guy is going to hurt his partner.

    27.He’s going to hurt your feelings. He’s going to say things that you don’t want him to say. He’s going to do things you wish he wouldn’t do and not do things you wish he would do.

    28.A relationship is an imperfect union between two willing spirits who say, ”I’d rather be in a relationship and share my life, share my joys, share my fun, share my activities, share my life than do it alone.”

    29.If you want to be in a relationship, know that getting hurt comes with the territory. You just have to decide that you are durable enough, that you have enough confidence in yourself that you can handle it.

    30.Don’t beat yourself up. You got through your last experience, you’ve learned from it, and now it’s time to move forward.

    31.”You’ll move on and be a champion in your next endeavor as you did in your past … Life is not a success-only journey. You are going to get beat up along the way.”

    32.Focus on yourself. All of us come into relationships with baggage, but you need to have closure on past experiences before you can start a new relationship with the odds in your favor.

    33.Are your standards too low? Dr. Phil asks a guest who’s waiting around for a man that’s let her down time and again: “What is it about you that causes you to settle for somebody that you know will cheat on you, know will lie to you, know will make a commitment and then break it? What is it about you that you believe about yourself that you’re willing to settle for that?”

    34.Recognize that you’re settling and that you deserve more. Set a higher standard for yourself.

    35.Does he really even make you happy? Be honest with yourself about the extent to which he’s really meeting your needs.

    36.Chances are you’re longing for the relationship that you wish it could be, and that you want to be in love with the person you wish he was.

    37.”There are times when you break up with somebody and you start missing them and you start thinking about all the good things.And then you’re back with them for about 10 minutes and you go ‘Oh yeah! Now I remember why I hate you!’” Don’t kid yourself about what it was really like or glorify the past.

    38.Don’t put your life on hold. Every minute you spend focusing on your ex is a minute that’s holding you back from a better future.

  • Self improvement: the little steps

    We all have periods in our lives when we feel down in the dumps.
    There is a distinct difference between being down or depressed – our article in the blue box below explains how to tell the difference.
    If you are depressed it is important to visit your GP who will be able to help you treat the condition.
    But for the many others whose mood is not severe enough for medical treatment there is much that can be done to improve the way they feel.
    Scientists have found that some simple changes to your life could improve your mood. From increasing your exercise output and drinking more water to eating Brazil nuts and listening to your favourite music – there is plenty you can do to transform the way you feel.
    Here is our guide to the top ten steps to improving your mood if you are feeling a little down in the dumps.

    1. DRINK PLENTY OF WATER

    We already know that drinking water keeps us hydrated and can improve our skin, but water also has a role to play in lifting our mood. Early findings of a survey carried out by the Food and Mood Project founded by MIND, shows more than half of 200 people questioned found six to eight glasses of water improved their mental state.
    Amanda Geary, who led the survey, says it is a well established scientific fact that insufficient amounts of water can cause confusion, irritability and poor concentration. This is because water carries nutrients into our body’s cells and toxins out of them. If we become dehydrated, our cells can’t function efficiently which can lead to an imbalance of electrolytes – ions in our body that cause movement of cells? causing confusion and poor concentration. 





    2. EAT TWO BRAZIL NUTS EVERY DAY 
    Believe it or not, eating foods rich in the mineral selenium or taking a selenium supplement can improve your mood. Eating two Brazil nuts or a small-sized bag of nuts and raisins on a regular basis has been shown to improve mood.
    A study published in Psychopharmacology showed that a supplement of 100 micrograms a day of selenium significantly improved mood and decreased anxiety among those patients who had low levels of selenium in their diet. Although more research is needed, it is thought that selenium is linked to thyroid function and if your thyroid is not receiving enough selenium it can affect mood and behaviour.
    The recommended daily dose for women is usually 60mg and 75mg for men – that’s around one-and-a-half Brazil nuts. Selenium is also found in grains, cereals and shellfish, particularly crab. If you want to lift your mood, have two nuts a day, but always consult with your GP if you want to increase this dose.

    3. LISTEN TO YOUR FAVOURITE MUSIC 
    Early findings by Oxford’s Brookes University suggest that listening to your favourite music while involved in tedious activities such as housework, washing and shopping induces positive mood change.
    Not only this, but listening to classical music can help improve emotional problems. Research by Dr Susan Hallam of Brookes University found that youngsters with emotional and behavioural problems who listened to Mozart during lessons showed improved concentration and behaviour. This is because classical music was shown to lower body temperature, heart rate, pulse and calm breathing rates.

    4. LAUGH MORE! 
    We’ve all heard the phrase ‘laughter is the best medicine’ but according to research laughing can really calm the mind and improve our mental wellbeing. And according to experts say we’re not laughing as much as we used to. People used to laugh 18 minutes a day in the 50s. Nowadays it’s just six minutes a day.
    Several studies demonstrate that laughter produces endorphins, natural chemicals that ease pain and produce a feeling of euphoria, helping us relieve physical and mental stress. Research by Professor William Fry from Stanford University demonstrated the physiological effects that laughter has on lowering blood pressure, heart rate, muscle relaxation and oxygen exchange.
    To up your daily laughter quote, try watching a funny film, spending more time with friends, or visiting a comedy club.
    5. AVOID DRINKING COFFEE 
    Ever wonder why you feel anxious after drinking several cups of coffee? A band of scientists think caffeine is the single most important cause of anxiety in our society and more than nine cups of coffee per day can lead to stress and panic attacks.
    So, if you’re feeling particularly anxious, avoid coffee.
    According to Dr Peter Rogers of Bristol University, our body produces adenosine – a natural sedative that helps keep us calm – but drinking too much coffee has the effect of blocking adenosine, leaving us feeling overstimulated. Although there is no recommended daily allowance for most groups of people, pregnant women should limit their caffeine intake to three mugs of coffee per day.


  • This Means War

    oh shyt content missing!!!